Managing Festive Stress This CNY: Tips from a Clinical Psychologist

09 January 2025

Chinese New Year is a time for family reunions, celebrations, and festive cheer.

Yet, behind the thrilling lion dances, the crackle of firecrackers, and delicious feasts, many find themselves grappling with a less festive emotion—stress. From the rush of preparing for the celebrations to the expectations around traditions, appearances, and even the dreaded questions by nosy relatives, the pressure can pile up fast.

If the thought of Chinese New Year leaves you feeling more stressed than excited, you’re not alone. In this article, our resident Clinical Psychologist, Evelyn Ngui, shares insights on festive stress and practical strategies to help you cope better.

What Is Festive Stress?

According to Evelyn, while festive stress may not be an official diagnosis, it is indeed very real.

Stress, as she defines it, occurs when an individual faces challenges that feel beyond their coping capacity. Festive stress, therefore, refers to stress triggered by factors specific to the festive season, such as the demands of festive preparations and expectations.

She adds that stress can present itself in different ways, leading to cognitive, emotional, behavioural and physical symptoms. Common signs of stress include:

• Cognitive: Excessive worries, unpleasant images, difficulty concentrating, easily distracted, poor decision making
• Behavioural: Nervous pacing, social withdrawal, excessive eating, aggression, drug use
• Physical: Heart palpitations, gastrointestinal upset, diarrhoea, body aches, muscle tension
• Emotional: Worried, nervous, frustrated, unsettled, depressed

Tips to Overcome Festive Stress

Festive stress can affect people in different ways, but certain stressors tend to be more common during this time of year.

To help you navigate the festive season, Evelyn highlights some of the most typical festive stress triggers and shares practical tips on how to manage them effectively.

1. Planning and preparation anxiety

This type of stress often arises when people set high expectations for themselves or feel compelled to take charge of everything, due to a lack of trust in others.

“Anxiety can start with good intentions such as wanting to make family and friends comfortable and welcomed. It becomes more pronounced when the need to be perfect and flawless gets out of hand,” she explains

Some helpful suggestions from Evelyn:

• Focus on the purpose: Remind yourself why you’re planning the festivities in the first place
• Delegate your responsibilities: Let go of the “I can do better” mindset

2.  Difficult family members

For challenging family dynamics, Evelyn emphasises that it’s all about communication and setting boundaries.

“Try using a respectful and loving tone to say, ‘I enjoy our family time together, and today I will not be answering questions about my personal life’,” she suggests.

Many people fear setting boundaries because they believe that it will destroy the relationship, as others might perceive it as rejection. However, Evelyn notes that having healthy boundaries can actually improve relationships.

As Evelyn reminds us, the key is to communicate your boundaries in a loving and respectful manner.

3. Loneliness or depression

The festive period is often a joyful time of gathering with friends and family for many, but for some, it can feel quite the opposite.

To cope with this type of stress, Evelyn highlights the importance of staying connected with one’s community rather than withdrawing into social isolation. This does not necessarily have to involve a large group—joining a smaller, trusted circle can be just as effective.

“Plugging yourself into a community may help you gain some meaning and joy from these interactions. You’ll discover more about yourself through the process too,” shares Evelyn.

However, she stresses the need for balance: it’s not about drowning yourself entirely in social activities but finding a healthy level of connection with others.

4. Grief from loss of a loved one

In such cases, Evelyn also recommends that individuals stay connected with their community.

However, she emphasises that it is perfectly okay for them to decide whether or not they want to celebrate the festive season.

“Communicate and set your own boundaries. Let people know, talk to people, and tell them what you need,” she advises.

As for those supporting someone struggling with loss, Evelyn stresses the importance of checking in with them, and respecting their wishes, even if it means them spending time alone during this festive season.

5. Pressure of expectations or comparison

This is a particularly common source of stress during the festive season for many. Evelyn emphasises the importance of learning not to engage with such expectations, especially if they are inevitable.

“To prevent mismatched expectations, refrain from controlling what you cannot control - such as your parents’ comparison or family conflicts. Focus on what you can control - responding in a loving manner and being firm when needed,” she shares.

Ultimately, Evelyn highlights that the key to navigating the festive season is to be kind—to yourself and to others. Focus on what you can manage, let go of what you cannot control, communicate your needs openly, and respect the boundaries of others.

If you find yourself unable to enjoy the festive season, frequently avoiding events, or skipping family gatherings due to low moods, it may be a sign to seek professional support. Don’t wait for things to worsen before you talk with a therapist. Schedule an appointment with our Consultant Psychiatrist or Clinical Psychologist today.

   Back